Tag: Children

Adjusting from one child, to two.

https://www.twenty20.com/photos/d6833c3d-5b53-465b-992e-06001cf835f5

When you have your first child although it can be scary, it’s full of excitement. It’s full of new adventures and endless love. The great thing about having your first little one, is the fact that it’s the first, there’s only one. No one really talks about what it’s like having two or more than one. You always hear how hard it can be, or how tired you will be. But honestly, when i had my first child. It was pretty easy compared to what it is like now, raising two babies.

The transition from one baby to two is pretty hard, or at least it was for me. Especially with breastfeeding. I have a one and a half year old and a now almost 2 month old baby. When my second child was born, after we got home it was so hard for me to adjust for a couple different reasons. Breastfeeding is very painful at first, and it’s super demanding. You have to constantly sit down every 2-3 hours and feed baby or pump and hope that your toddler is satisfied or distracted until you’re done. Breastfeeding is also painful every time at first. It also makes your body cramp, and for me after having my second child, the cramps were unearthly painful. I really didn’t think i could continue to breastfeed because i was in so much pain. Both of those things combine, on top of not getting any sleep, and having to chase a toddler around after just having a baby made my world chaos.

I really though for a couple of weeks that i was going to lose my mind, it was the first time ever that i had felt completely defeated regarding motherhood. I was so upset and tired, really questioning myself and if i was able todo this. As if i had any choice, haha. But it was really hard for me for awhile. Eventually i adjusted to the loss of sleep, breastfeeding became easier and the cramping stopped. It was still hard because the schedule i had with my toddler was out the door. He wasn’t napping, didn’t want to sleep in his crib, and i felt absolutely awful for the fact i could no longer give him all my attention. I was heartbroken. Because i knew he just wanted the attention. Which made it even harder to reenforce the schedule.

Right now, after adjusting things still get hard. I still have my mini breakdowns and i still stress out from time to time. At first it was figuring out how to balance two children, and now i’m trying to make those little times for me to regroup. Like taking a shower alone, or riding to town alone, or just walking to the mailbox alone. Just to give me that short amount of time to breath. It’s important to have that. Mother’s and father’s need that. Don’t let anyone make you feel guilty for needing a second to just breath.

Having children is really an amazing thing, it’s a beautiful experience. But no one prepared me for the adjustment of a second child and having them close together didn’t make it easier. And i’m still learning, it’s still hard. Time is now divided, i get very little time to myself, if any at all. Dishes don’t get done right away, laundry sits awhile before it gets folded, toys may sit on the floor a little longer, and the list goes on. But i really couldn’t imagine my life any other way. When times get hard, when i feel like i’m at my breaking point i just remember they are only little once. And i know before i even realize it, that this time will be gone.

So to all those stressed momma’s out there, ones who are going through this, who are about to, let your toddler crawl in the bed with you. Hold that newborn a little longer. Enjoy watching your toddler run around playing with everything they can get their hands on. Because as hard as it might be in that moment, it will end. You’ll find time for a little break. And everything will be okay. Although having another child, is an adjustment and can be hard it’s such a blessing.

Crazy Lady Freaks Out over a Teen Mom?!

One of the most wonderful things about parenthood is there is no “right way” todo it, as long as it works for you and your kids. There’s so many opinions, myths, and do’s and don’ts. But really as long as it works for you and it’s safe for your kids who cares what anyone else thinks!

As a young mother people who don’t know you, assume you must have absolutely no idea what you’re doing. And then even sometimes people who DO know you, think you need all 105 of their opinions. And with that follows all kinds of opinions and people telling you what you’re doing is wrong. And it’s hard to always keep your composure and ignore those people. Well i’m here to tell all those first time moms, it’s okay to parent YOUR way. It’s okay to ask for help, to take advice OR it’s OKAY to ignore all the opinions that get thrown your way.

As long as your child is taken care of, fed and clothed you won’t ever hear me throwing out opinions UNLESS someone asks. Which is what a lot of other people should be doing, now don’t read this and think if a child is being hurt, is in danger, or being neglected you should just keep to yourself. Most defiantly speak up!

I watched a video about an incident that happened the other day involving a teen mother of two. Her whole family took a trip to the grocery store. She sat in the backseat of the car with her infant and toddler while her husband went inside to shop for groceries. She posted pictures of what her car looked like and what she looked like sitting in the back seat with the two children. You can clearly see through the windows of the car, as there is no tint. You could clearly see the car was on and she states many times to the security that came to check on her multiple times that she was fine and the A/C was on.

But because this girl didn’t look 30 or older, the woman assumed she was a child and that her and the other two babies were trapped in the car with the A/C off. She was causing a huge scene in the store, even after she was told the kids and the woman in the car were fine. She then proceeds to call the police. After she was told the woman in the car was the mother of the two children, she pulled out her phone and started to video yelling that they were bad parents. How were they being bad parents? Not really sure. How do you even react to a situation like that? Especially when you sit in your car with your children to make the shopping trip easier? But instead you get a crazy lady causing a scene for her facebook page.

The woman never walked up to the car she stood from afar and spied on the car. If i see children in danger, locked in a car, with no A/C i’m not going to stand from afar and wait for someone else todo something about it. She didn’t even bother asking the woman IN the car (the mother) if she was okay or needed help. If you see someone that is in danger, or think someone is in danger always do what you can to help. But even AFTER security told her multiples times that they were fine she continued to act insane. The cops arrived and nothing happened after that because they confirmed the lady was crazy and it was a waste of a 911 call. Not only did she upset that mother, she made herself look like fool and most importantly wasted a 911 call that could of taken time and officers away from a real life threatening situation.

Now i know if i saw kids, especially babies sitting in a car i would double check to make sure there was an adult or an older sibling in the car with them. Because to many children are dying in cars. But sometimes you have to swallow your pride and admit you’re wrong. If she was truly worried about the safety of the people in the car after she saw they were okay, and/or was told by the security who checked on them multiple times and talked to the mother in the car, that they were okay. I would go on with my day.

Moms, please don’t let situations like this get to you. There really are people in this world who have nothing better todo than cause a scene for attention or views online. Put your kids first and never let anyone make you feel like you are bad parent. I don’t know what i would of even done in this situation, and i hope the young mother isn’t to bothered by it either. Just be respectful of others.

*DISCLAIMER*

If you see a child(ren) locked in a car, Please do what you can to help them. Call 911.

If you see someone in danger, Please do what you can to help them. Call 911.

Helping someone who truly needs it, is NOT being nosy.